First the earth cooled. Many millions of years later, I appeared and decided that having a convenient outlet for self-expression and public exchanges would be a good thing, so here it is. I'll be posting whatever strikes me as interesting, useful, or funny. I hope to get as much as I give, so don't be shy--let me know what you think (click on "Comments (Add/View)" under the entry) and I'll get a notice. I'm Glenn, the Glennformer, and this is Glennformation.

Sunday, May 6, 2007

essential info about my backpack or a bad picture of biting a fork?


Answer: Both. I sent this picture, originally, as a bad substitute for not having a picture of biting a fork--sometimes I have the caption before I have the photo. However, I get lots of questions about my backpack. One brother calls it my "Millennium Backpack". I admit that, in many ways, I'm just an aging boy scout and still adhere to the motto "be prepared". I've decided to do an inventory, both to remind myself of what the hell I'm carrying around all the time and, likely, make some changes and to have a basis for a "what's in my backpack?" contest. To answer a recent question and give you an early start on imagining what might be in there, it weighed 25 pounds when I weighed it a week ago on Friday (and that's without my laptop and charger, which adds another 7 pounds).

40 comments:

Anonymous said...

So do you still carry around room temperature blue powerades? YUCK!oh yeah and that half eaten bagel from yesterday.(Just kidding!)
So today at work I requested some disk space and the unix guy mentioned spindles and that dbas care about them.. and well that reminded me of you and your opionion on the topic. Does archaic ring a bell....

Angie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Glennformer said...

Answers: You were close. Yes, there's still the occasional "blue" (probably Cascade Rush), room temperature Gatorade. Yumm-yumm! However, you should make a note that, lately, my trend has been towards the Rain varieties--just as many calories but with the illusion of being lighter. Also, yes, there usually is one or more PowerBars. Feel free to continue to smush those two clearly distinct items into "powerades" but don't discount that lack of attention to detail hurting your chances to be selected as my official biographer.

I don't believe it! I thought that after we no longer worked together I would be relieved from having to send you my policy statement on database storage issues, AGAIN! Okay, one last time, I'll find the most recent version and send it to you. Your UNIX guy is right, we DO care about them, just with different emphasis given the particulars; archaic architecture and resources requires the equally archaic but appropriate storage strategies. The next time I boot up my Commodore VIC-20 (circa 1983) to run my game program, I'll be hooking it up to the audio cassette storage and doing sequential access, using the latest "guess where it ought to be on the tape and fast forward to that area" technology--I won't be looking for an interface to a SAN with RAID-6 (7?, 23?). Why can't I find a good abacus when I need one? Anyway, thanks for remembering, it was fun working with you EVEN when you didn't agree me. (3 times? 4?)

Anonymous said...

Ok.. so maybe I was off on the name of the room temperature blue liquid in a bottle you frequently carried around, but, just so that you know in case you did not, there is a similar type drink called Powerade. So my attention to detail, although in this case a bit off, is clearly not as lacking as you may like to think. I usually pay more attention to detail with things that interest me. So the next time you feel the need to point out my error made in jest, make sure you don't leave room for me to give it back. :-)

Hm.. now that I think about it I forgot that you still work with archaic architecture where spindles should be of concern...

Anonymous said...

I know what you mean about "being prepared".

How goes it? Enjoying the summer? It actually isn't real hot this summer! :)

I don't have a blog, but see myspace.com/larryjohnVA

nancy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
nancy said...

3 months.

your blog officially SUCKS.

nancy said...

I'm REALLY glad you set up your site feeds, cause I'd be missing out on all your new blog posting.

nancy said...

you are talking to me right now about VPN blah blah blah wireless blah blah blah. And it's really boring.

Anonymous said...

Any dates?

Anonymous said...

You don't need to put up more blogs, cause this one is cool enough to live on forever.

Anonymous said...

We hate you

Anonymous said...

Boring Blog. Good job!

Anonymous said...

Do you have any shoe peg corn in stock?

Anonymous said...

crazy maniacal laughing is good.

Anonymous said...

We have a sale on fanny packs and realized you were the only guy in america who still wears them. Want to buy out our entire stock?

Anonymous said...

do you know that calculator + watch equals?

Anonymous said...

it's better than sex

Anonymous said...

We miss him. You bastard.

Anonymous said...

Comments are not boring. We hate you now.

Anonymous said...

There is a new member.

Anonymous said...

We're sorry to inform you that you have lost a member.

Anonymous said...

If only you put the time into fixing me.

Anonymous said...

Good thing you spend so much on your boat! It's been a lovely season cruising. Oh wait, it's been a lovely season sitting on dry land.

Anonymous said...

because mine does.

Anonymous said...

We wanted to know if you would like to join our club.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your application, but we can not accept your membership now. Maybe you can find solice in our sister company. We've forwarded the information off to them, but since they only like to work, they've probably already contacted you.

Anonymous said...

I heard there is a mother in Colorado who could really use $700.

Anonymous said...

Hey buddy! I miss working with you. Oh wait, I miss working next to you. No, that won't do. I miss reading my yahoo mail next to you while you fix my fuckups.

Anonymous said...

Have you decided on your membership yet?

Anonymous said...

We've heard from various sources that you are one of the greatest idea-men in history. Have you thought about a career change?

Anonymous said...

We would like you to consider new membership.

Anonymous said...

We were just notified from a group calling themselves the "DorksWhoWorkLateClub" that they are aware of your work ethic and they wanted to pre-screen us for your future employment. We don't understand why they would contact us for you, since you haven't even responded to our offer. We asked how it is they represent you and they told us you were almost a member. We are not sure how this makes them your spokesperson, but we've decided to answer their pre-qualification questions now, since we really would like a man of your caliber working for us.

1. We do not offer comp time for overtime. We offer salaried positions. We ask for 8 hours of work per day. If an employee decides they want to do more than it is expected, we do not compensate for that, except to recognize the hard work through biannual reviews. If there is more work to do that can be done in an 8 hour period, we expect to be informed of this and we will take care of it.

2. We work on a flextime schedule, but core hours of 9am-3pm must be worked. You can come in earlier or later, as long as the 9-3 hours are covered in your schedule.

3. Status reports are requested, but they are asked to not be too detailed. We only need a bulleted overview and if we need further information, we will ask. We believe when providing a status report, including data collection and writing time, becomes an event that needs to be statused on itself because of the immense amount of work involved in it, it's no longer a status report.

4. We ask all employees to worry about their own tasks. We are not a daycare in which we need tattletails.

5. When we ask someone to do a task, we don't want commentary on why the task shouldn't be done or how it could be done differently. We hire our employees to work for us, not to reorganize the way we do business.

I hope this helps in your decision to give our company a chance. I can't tell you enough how many of our employees love working for us. No long hours, no accountability for doing something they were told to do, no worrying about others. We've been told we are the best employers out there. And we hope you will consider us.

Anonymous said...

We have become aware of a job opportunity that has been offered to you. We do not think you would be happy with the company after discussing how they do business. There is no opportunity for you to be a martyr and we know that is most important to you.

We hope you are considering membership.

Anonymous said...

Hi there! ~wink~

Anonymous said...

Recently, you were given a message by our automated system. This message was in error. We apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused you.

Anonymous said...

Hi there! ~wink~

Anonymous said...

Are you available Sunday for some coffee?

Anonymous said...

Hello there! We wanted to stop in and let you know you were our most POPULAR site today.

Glennformer said...

Yippeee!